This is it, the big one, the massive motherf$&% that tells you how to think like a GM. How do you handle it when a character does absolutely anything? You read this f$&%ing article!

Most GMs have no idea how to properly use the skill/action resolution in their game. And that’s a pretty f$&%ing major thing not to know. Let me school you.

What do you do when your players actually decide to talk to things? How do you handle social interaction? The same way you handle every other f$&%ing action. But if you need more detail than that, read this article.

There comes a certain time in every GM’s life when he starts to notice changes. Suddenly, he starts to take an interest in those strange creatures sitting across the table from him. Or her. Whatever. They are players. And their ways can be strange, mysterious, and vexing. And they can make a GM feel all sorts of strange emotions: nervousness, fear, frustration, and violent rage. But, no matter how strange and confusing, no GM can live without players. So, eventually, every GM has to figure out how to talk to players.

Usually about five seconds into the first game session.

There are three vital lessons that every GM has to figure out. And figure out sooner rather than later. How to adjudicate actions. How to narrate the game. And the harsh reality that there’s no such thing as making the best decision “for the game.” And also the harsh reality that being a GM pretty much sucks.

Do you have a little voice in the back of your head saying “okay, playing these RPG things is fun and all, but I really want the screen. I want to run games. How do I run games?” Well, this article is for you. This is how to give yourself the best chance to succeed at running your first session of D&D or Pathfinder or Star Wars or whatever.